Geeze Louise, You Two are Easy to Love.

You Made Some People

Matt Upton

I have written this bad boy about 5 times.  I just am not sure what I can say that matches how I am feeling about this milestone.  40 years.  This number is amazing to me.  I know that it was not always bliss filled, but you two are absolute proof, that weathering difficult times can strengthen a bond and create a lasting and positive relationship.  I have had a chance to see all of the photo's that people have sent to Carla (who should get the majority of the credit for this, by the way, she pretends to be a hard ass who will punch you in the neck, but she is one of the sweetest most loving individuals on the planet.) and I have to say, how much fun it has been to see some key moments especially from your past.  I saw one picture of mom wearing dad's navy hat, and I couldn't help but smile, I want a copy.

Because of this partnership, I am here.  Not only did you guys bring me into this world, but you took your jobs seriously; you raised not only me, but also my two sweet little sisters.  We learned through your example, and through lessons you tried to teach us along the way.  You have supported us in ways that may not be evident to us until we are old and grey and are dealing with little brats of our own.  I will forever appreciate the emphasis you put on learning, and the arts.  I have so many fond memories of travel around and all the adventures our family had along the way.  I have always known that I could talk to either of you about pretty much anything, and though I may have been in trouble, I knew, no matter what, at the end of the day, I had a mom and dad who love me unconditionally.

I am so proud and honored to be able to congratulate you for 40 years of marriage, I am so happy for the two of you to be living on your terms living where you want to live, and being able to do activities that bring joy to you.  I love you guys, and I wish you many, many more years of happiness!

Matt 

P.S.  I keep this picture on my desk.  If I am having a rough day, it provides me with an automatic smile.

Carla Upton

Mom and Dad -

Happy 40th wedding anniversary. I hope you enjoy the blog. What started out as "let's give it a shot and see what happens," turned into a supremely fantastic project confirming what we already know- just how fantastic and wonderful you guys are. I'm greatful every day for you guys. Even though it's not said I love you and really hope you enjoy reading what everybody said .  Love love love you.

As a side note I couldn't have accomplished this blog without Matt and Chrissy's help (Chrissy is definitely a Mom Jr. She didn't let any of my spelling and punctuation errors sneak by her.)*

Also the videos and most of the pictures wouldn't be up with out Chrissy.

*Including these ones, which she tried to put in at the 11th hour so I wouldn't notice...

Chrissy Upton

Ma and Pops,

Forty years. Seriously, you two. Congratulations, Good Job, Thank You, and Holy Shit.

When Carla suggested this project, I was excited to honor you, but had no idea it would prove so meaningful to me as well. This gave me the opportunity to not only paw through pictures (that I had never seen before and that I love so much) of your past (courtesy of Aunt Jo), but also to see that it’s not just Matt, Carla, and I who have benefited from your decision to start a family. 

Here are some things I have learned/thought/realized from this process. 

1)      Your love for people in their truest form has honestly changed lives. Reading the words of family and friends made me realize that I have NEVER brought someone home whom you did not treat with respect and acceptance. When I think about some of the people I have brought home, this is truly an amazing feat. And yet, you feed them, you drive them around, and more often than not you create your own relationship with them. You love them. You laugh with them. You share your lives with them. This behavior has resulted in the perpetual growth of the Clark-Upton clan. I have countless sisters and brothers, aunts and uncles, made from unconditional love, rather than blood (although I have some pretty damn badass blood aunts/uncles/cousins too.) Thank you for this. It’s a tradition I plan to continue as long as I live. 

2)      You have taught me that even in the toughest moments you can find laughter. Whether it is remembering someone we love through funny stories or finally just laughing at how stupid an argument really is. You have always used laughter as a way to heal and overcome obstacles. When I miss you it is the laughing I think about most. You have created a family of loud, sincere laugh-ers. I really like that about us. 

3)      You are just fuckin’ adorable. You were in ’75 and you are today. Cute as fuckin’ buttons. When I was going through photos I kept seeing Matt in Dad and Carla in Mom. I fell in love with Pop’s mustache and puffy coat, and the cute little curve of Mom’s nose and her ever-present toothy grin. Your smiles have apparently always been contagious, and I spent no less than two hours with a ridiculous one of my own while I scanned away. (The cheek pain is not over as I have two more boxes of the Upton side. WhittlebabyJimmyhasthecutestDIMPLE.) 

4)      You have and will always be there when someone you love is in need. You give through your time and talents, your energy and your pockets. You never ask for anything in return, and often don’t even get the gratitude you deserve, and yet here you are, still doing it after all of these years. 

5)      I don’t tell you thank you enough. I have never told you thank you enough. Truth be told it would be impossible to thank you enough. 

6)      You made me the best brother and sister anyone could ever hope for. They are just like you. They love me more than any sensible person should, and they show it in their own unique and adorable ways. They have both followed your lead, and chosen to spend every day of their lives helping improve the lives of others. They give, give, give and love, love, love AND make the very best fart jokes. What else could a girl ask for? 

7)      The signs of your pet hoarding were showing early. It’s no surprise you have found yourselves where you are. Thank God for it too. What the hell would we do without our babies? 

8)      It is impossible to express everything I am thinking and feeling here. I have learned I need to do a better job of saying it to you when it crosses my mind, instead of waiting for a milestone. 

9)      I am a lucky little shit.

I suppose that is it for now. I wish this could adequately express everything in this brain. But it can’t and won’t, so I will creatively problem solve a way to get the rest of it out of here and to you.

I love you guys. I love you so, so, so much. Thank you for starting our family. Thank you for pushing through the not-so-pretty times for all the prettiest ones. Thank you for always being an example of love, growth,  forgiveness, as well as the proper use of red wine and pina coladas (sometimes in the same night.)

Sugar

P.S. I only said fuck twice three times!

Jennifer White

Adorable video will be privately shared.

Meg Groat

Amber Meier

Mmm...

Sushi

Calamari

Saigon Beef with Noodles

Wait, wait...

Going to my first real bar

Accidentally driving to California

Okay so you weren't technically there for all these adventures, but I kind of feel like you were responsible for them either directly or indirectly.

You have both accomplished so much in your forty years together, but your greatest accomplishments, in my opinion, are your three amazing kids.

When you befriend and Upton child you immediately gain another set of parents, whether they are your second set, your first set, or third, etc. You guys are the parents the push for you to try new things, you are supportive no matter the choices we make, and you only want the best for us.

You are for me, like so many others, my second family and for this I am truly grateful.

Happy 40th Anniversary.

Barbra and Jerry Wolfe

Jim and Judy,

Wonderful people who have raised a great family and adopted many other souls that have wandered into and out of their lives. Happy to share life with anyone that can stand dog hair and we can stand dog hair. In thinking about our time together, it seems impossible to have so many good experiences in such a short time. We would have to write a book to include everything, maybe someday. 

In no order of importance or memory here are some of the strongest memories:

Karen, Bear River, Green Twinkies and wine, therapy dogs, Red Butte Garden, East West Connection, Friday night movies, chocolate factory, Chicos, the Apple Store, Lake View Hospital, the BCC Food Pantry, Road Home and empty bowls.

We wanted to print some photos since we're almost always taking pictures. Jerry and I tried to find stuff you may not have (Carla will hand them to you.)

Congratulations, Happy Anniversary, and Thank Tou for sharing your life with us.

We love and miss you and are always thinking of ways to get to Oregon.

Jerry and Barbara 

And the newer dogs Chico and mini and rocket 

Photos from the Collection of Joan Hayes

It was supremely difficult to pick pictures from the boxes Aunt Jo gave me. You will be recieving a fancy stick full of more gems in short order.

Wonder who Grandma's most favorite person in the world was....

<3 <3 <3 <3

Apparently Mom can't smile with her eyes open, but Dad loves her anyway.

This 'stache is back in style! Pops, you trendsetter, you. 

Mom had a pocket dog before it was Hollywood. Also that coat!

Mr. Nerd

Mrs. Nerd

The Nerds

But really good looking nerds.

Connie McKee

Connie wished you guys a very happy  fortieth wedding anniversary.  She sent us a bunch of cool pictures and a poem Aunt Marguerite wrote:

Perry Buckner

Hey Jim and Judy,

Happy 40th Anniversary! 🎉

I am so glad that I got to know you two and your children all those many years ago and I'm grateful for the generosity and kindness you've always shown me and my son! It was always such a huge relief to know that I could always count on you and your family. You and your entire family have had a huge influence on both of us and especially on Aaron during those all important developmental years of his early life. I knew Aaron would always be in great hands if anything were to happen to me, and I can't tell you how important that was and even is still today. You are family to us, we couldn't ask for anything more!! So, congratulations on reaching another big milestone in your partnership! It's such a rare accomplishment anymore and an inspiration to all of us who love you two so very much!

~ Perry

Kelly Upton

Aunt Judy & Uncle Jim, 

You welcomed me into the Upton Family with open arms.  Aunt Judy graciously made all the dresses for my girls in my wedding, always so patient and kind.  Thank you for all the encouragement, answering my silly questions when I was completing my BA.  You always have the most patient, kind answers yet painfully honest!  Uncle Jim, I have never heard you say a negative thing other than talking about politics!  I admire and appreciate your appreciation for all points of view, even when you don't agree.  Both your sense of humor is refreshing and absolutely hilarious.  Thank you for your love and support though we are miles and miles apart.  I love you, Happy 40th Anniversary!! Raise your glass to 40 more!!!!

Kelly Upton

Jeremy Upton

My uncle has always been my hero, I would beg to stay the night at his house even when he was going to be home late working vice, my aunt the most understanding lady I have ever met!  She taught me how to drive a stick on a hill!!  I stalled it 10 times if I stalled it once!  She would just smile and say its ok try it again those people can go around us.  But together they have always been amazing!  I've seen them laugh together much more than they ever disagreed. They are truly one of the greatest influences in my life, everything from the way I love my kids to the way I relate to my wife.  I love and appreciate you both.  Most of all I appreciate what you have represented in my life.  Congrats on 40 years!  Damn your guys are old!!

Jeremy

Kathy Maughan

Happy 40th Anniversary Jim and Judy!! 

So happy for you both! Two of the most loving, caring and giving people I know. <3 Cheers to 40+ more wonderful years and more!!

Love you,

Kathy Maughan

Abbie and Peter Chase

Judy and Jim. Wow 40 years!! Congratulations!

It seems a long time ago when we met in Bountiful at BCC. (1983 to be exact).

I was always so impressed with your dedication to participation. When there was something to do the Uptons would be there.

Also how wonderful all your kids were in treating the other kids with respect and kindness. Truly extraordinary. You guys deserve a big pat on the back!

Have enjoyed our renewed connection via Facebook. Thank you internet! With it I know we will continue to follow each other despite our distance in miles. Who would have thought you would end up in Oregon and we would be in Vermont?

Can't wait to see pics of the party. Xoxo Abbie and Peter

Crystal and Ben Poling

Susan and Ron Geerdes

Congratulations! We think of you frequently.

Robin and Gary wheelright

HaPpY AnNiVeRsArY Jim and Judy. Wishing you many, many more years together !

Congratulations, Gary & Robin Wheelwright

Bill and Sylvia Upton

Jim and Judy,

Congratulations on forty years. Sorry we could not be with you but we are
looking forward to getting up there when we can.

I am not sure what the statistical probability is of guys who get married in
baby blue tuxedos but I can assume your longevity is in the upper five
percent. 

Thank you for being the best aunt and uncle or kids could ask for.
So happy for you guys, next is the silver, hang in there.

Bill & Sylvia

Sherri Dickerson

Very lovely letter shared privately. :)

Marie Anderson

I remember they didn't know me yet and they got me a warm, cute, pink coat. That was nice and they don't even know me! They gave me orange juice with bubbles and yummy Christmas food. They gave me dolls that were black like me. They told me I was beautiful and I had cool hair. They helped make it ok to be black.

Everyone at Christmas gave me books because Mom was going to teach me to read. I still have all the books and I can read now too.

Papa Jim tells me on Facebook I am beautiful too. 

I am glad they got married because they are awesome.

Marie Anderson

Judy Lund

I can't believe it's been 40 years!  Where has all the time gone?  

Mignon McLaughlin once said "A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person." You are both living proof that the bond of marriage grows stronger year by year, if that bond is built on true love. 

With love and best wishes on your anniversary. Congratulations on 40 fabulous years and here's to lots more to come!

Happy anniversary!  All my love,  Judy

Photos from the Collection of Sam and Andrea Baugh

Seth Baugh

Nancy King

I can't say enough... in fact I don't think there are words to express how wonderful I think Judy Clark-Upton is. Most of my experience with her has been through Toledo Jr./Sr. High were she has worked with my two oldest children. 

My oldest daughter had a very negative experience at a different school, and it affected her emotionally and socially for years. She was very shy, and often was unable to interact easily with her fellow classmates. When she became a junior high student Judy offered a small social skills group-- a way for kids who were struggling to make friends and navigate school to become more confident and more self-assured. There's also the fact that Judy helps support my daughter's crippling book habit by having her come and do housework every so often. It gives my daughter so much pride and confidence to have her own job and her own money. In just a few years my daughter has blossomed into an amazing young woman, and I see more of the old her. It has been a priceless gift. 

Then there is my son. If anyone had told my 8 years ago that my son would be in a regular classroom doing advanced work, and doing it all really well... I don't if I would have believed them. I'm not saying that Judy's completely responsible for the amazing changes taking place in my son's school life--there was a whole team of people who have helped and supported him--but I will blame her for helping him to be so successful in junior high. She has provided him with all the support he needed, and then given him the tools to have control over himself and his education. She is completely amazing. 

Both of my older children absolutely love "Mrs. Clark-Upton", and I'm sure when my youngest gets to the Jr/Sr High that she will as well. She won't be able to help herself. :)

Nancy King

(Nancy mentioned that she knows Mom much better than Dad, but Dad, you seem like a sweetheart. :)

Bonnie and Mike Clark

It is hard to believe it has been forty years.  My how time flies.   It is amazing how you two compliment each other.   Mike remembers Judy being a pain in the butt growing up (probably because she had to put up with three brothers), but felt like when Jim came along it really settled her down.  You have created the most beautiful and awesome human beings in your three children.   They are so delightful to be around and have the same compassion and kindness for others as well as all pets as you do.  What you do for others, we are in awe.   Even though we don't get to see each other often, when we do it is a very easy and enjoyable time.  Congratulations to you guys and we are very fortunate to have you in our lives.

Love,

Bonnie and Mike

Paige and Ashley

Dear Jim and Judy,

You have had an enormous impact on our lives. And by the way… it was a really good impact. You both are so kind and generous. Thanks for helping to instill the love of animals into us. We seriously want to be like you when we grow up.  Also --  you’ve raised three of our favorite people ever! How did you do that? They’re all so kind and loving (and sassy). The best kind of combination! Thanks for being so lovely. We adore you quite a lot!

Love,

Paige, Ashley, Ryann, and Bailey 

P.S. We hope you enjoy our photo shoot. It was difficult to get the sisters to sit still together... obviously. Xoxo. 

Chris Baugh

Sam and Andrea Baugh

Dear Jim and Judy, (AKA Papa and Nana Upton),

I cannot begin to tell you how much knowing you has enriched my life. 

First because of you I met the love of my life. 

Andrea was pretty messed up before she met you, you took her in and helped her see outside of the small world she grew up in. 

Because of you she was working with TURN in the residential program at the Pebble Creek apartments. Because she was working there Earl decided she needed to date someone. He found me. And I have enjoyed my life everyday since then. 

Because of you I have found a deep love for the Oregon Coast. Because of you I have 3 wonderful children. Because of you I am a better person and have learned much.

Happy Anniversary

Sam

There are really no words that I can find to express how I feel about everything you have done to change the world together over the last 40 years.  

I think back to being 18 years old and dropping off a green Rice Krispie treat that was in the shape of a G because the Packers were playing. Even though Matt wasn't home you invited me in. Little did you know that when you invited me in I would never go away, it’s hard to believe it has been 16 years now. 

You gave me unconditional love, forgiveness, a place to stay, a job, a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, a swift kick when I needed it, new experiences, a love of calamari (it’s not chicken), a whole new appreciation for K9 kids and Kitties, experiences I would have never been open to before. You showed me new movies, new music, new food, new people, and the idea that taking the road less traveled or a detour from your plan can be fun. 

You guys have given me such an example of self-less service, love and acceptance that I will always be grateful for. You loved me through some dark times and always made sure I knew there was someone who loved me no matter what.  

You opened my eyes to a whole new way to look at the world. There is no way I can express how incredibly grateful I am for the impact the two of you have had on my life and the lives of my children.  

The children you raised are amazing. Not only did you make the world a better place by your endless service you raised children that are going out and doing the same.

Congratulations 40 years of Wedded Bliss. Thank you for letting me be a part of your lives and everything you have done to impact my life and help shape who I am today.  

I love you guys!!

Andrea

Heather Dulin

Dear Jim and Judy,

Let me start off by saying congratu-freakin-lations! I can’t imagine doing anything in my life for 40 years (other than breathing and eating) and look at y’all, making marriage look easy. :) 

You two have been such an inspiration to so many, myself included. There was never a time that I did not feel welcomed in your home and in your family. Growing up a young, gay isn’t easy, doing it in Bountiful made it feel impossible at times. I couldn’t have gotten through it without the two of you and your amazing children. You guys have never made me feel like an outsider or feel ashamed of who I am. Ever. That is something I value so highly and will never be able to repay you for.

Thank you for the years of friendship and love. Thank you for showing me that marriage can last and that it is worth the work. Thank you for raising three smart, kind, generous, loving and exceptional children. Thank you for teaching me all of those things too. I know how proud you must be of all of your kids, I hope that I make you proud as well.

Here’s to 40 more!

-Heather